The curious creations of christine mcconnell

What the absolute streaming hell is this?

sSeriously. I watched one episode, and I can’t really answer that.

The IMDB.com entry describes the show as “part cooking show, part sitcom in the vein of the Addams Family and the Muppet Show,” but I can’t say that The Curious Creations of Christine McConnell succeeds on any of those fronts.

There are, indeed, puppets. There is a reanimated raccoon, a cat that was once worshiped in Egypt, and a werewolf who arrives as their guest. Oh...and an octopus who lives in the refrigerators, but she hasn’t any lines, yet. They are all painfully snarky, but not in a fun or joyful way. They just seem to hate each other and just about everything else than eating.

The Addams Family? I grew up on that kitschy masterpiece, and this show is nothing like that. The strength of the Addamses was that they saw their lives as completely normal and the humor came from the fact that they were joyously odd and “normal” people would react badly and then go on to learn some greater truth from Uncle Fester or something. There is no joy in this house. The raccoon honestly wants to kill people. They know they are weird, and they lash out because of it.

And the cooking part….well, that fails, as well. I think perhaps all of the other bells and whistles were deemed necessary because while Christine McConnell makes foods that are incredible to look at, her personality in front of the camera is - well - flat. Maybe that is an act, but it is entirely impossible to tell. Additionally, episode 1 saw two foods made. First, she made pretzel-based bones with so much white chocolate coating that the pretzel and peanut butter had to get lost in the mix. Then, after the werewolf arrived (lest you forget the crazy in which we are operating), McConnell makes a cake shaped like their Victorian home for his welcome party. Given, the cake is lovely, but we get to see very little of it made as the entire structure is formed when the segment begins.

I usually give a new show the customary four episodes to win me over, but I was making deals with myself before episode I hit the 10-minute mark. I don’t hate myself enough to watch another. I have one friend who is engaged via the “so bad it’s good” mentality, but I cannot even get there.

The Curious Creations of Christine McConnell may aim to kill us with creepiness this Halloween season, but it misses the heart.